crushing fate

5:16pm: sippin on a hippo
working on computers
in
about
digital file recovoury ..salvaging
structuring designing dedicating and predicting
The 4 sea able users usurp
I give it all to you

6:54pm: Swann's Way
For a long time I used to go to bed early. Sometimes, when I had put out
my candle, my eyes would close so quickly that I had not even time to say
"I'm going to sleep." And half an hour later the thought that it was time
to go to sleep would awaken me; I would try to put away the book which, I
imagined, was still in my hands, and to blow out the light; I had been
thinking all the time, while I was asleep, of what I had just been
reading, but my thoughts had run into a channel of their own, until I
myself seemed actually to have become the subject of my book: a church, a
quartet, the rivalry between François I and Charles V. This impression
would persist for some moments after I was awake; it did not disturb my
mind, but it lay like scales upon my eyes and prevented them from
registering the fact that the candle was no longer burning. Then it would
begin to seem unintelligible, as the thoughts of a former existence must
be to a reincarnate spirit; the subject of my book would separate itself
from me, leaving me free to choose whether I would form part of it or no;
and at the same time my sight would return and I would be astonished to
find myself in a state of darkness, pleasant and restful enough for the
eyes, and even more, perhaps, for my mind, to which it appeared
incomprehensible, without a cause, a matter dark indeed

1:28pm: or..
..maybe (it's) not (averted).

12:19am: apocalypse not yet
catastrophe aborted. purrr.

9:34pm: sans pepper
so insanely fcuking sad.

5:33pm: posting this because google$ working in cahoots with nytime$ to keep their wallets evergrowing
“Saddam house. ..Now, Bush house.” -9yo Iraquian

***
My Long War
Dexter Filkins
Published: August 22, 2008
***

I.

I pulled on my running shoes and stepped into the sweltering streets. It was a Thursday in July 2003, twilight, and well over 100 degrees. I was feeling a little reckless. If this ended badly, the only thing anyone would remember was how stupid I was.

We had set up the New York Times office on Abu Nawas Street. We lived and worked there: an Ottoman-style house with a gated yard and a veranda on the second floor that looked out on a boulevard that tracked the eastern bank of the Tigris River. In those first days, we didn’t fortify the place; no razor wire or blast walls, no watchtowers or machine guns mounted on the roof. Cars motored past our front yard on their way to the Jumhuriya Bridge a couple of miles up the road.

In the beginning, Baghdad wasn’t that threatening. The other houses around us were either abandoned or rented by foreigners: the French Embassy and the BBC were around the corner. And the Iraqis in the neighborhood were friendly, waving whenever we passed. Running at night seemed reckless, but given the otherworldy heat, running during the day was impossible.

So I set off. The reaction of my neighbors was immediate. I felt like a revelation, like a prophet. Men looked up and waved; they held up bottles of water as I ran by. “Good, good!” one man said in English. “America good!” Abu Nawas was lined with fish restaurants that overlooked the Tigris; as I passed, men held up chunks of masgouf, their beloved bony fish, and asked me to join. Children stopped their soccer games and ran after me; even the stray dogs gave pursuit. I felt I was living the scene in the movie “Rocky II,” when the character played by Sylvester Stallone goes for a training run in his Philadelphia neighborhood and all the children clamor after him. ( continued.. )

8:25pm: .*.no links.*.

( more graphics )

11:50pm: body melt
australian movies are so f*cked. in a good way.
-

10:58pm:

life may offer the world, humanity has imprisoned it.

---

I always looked-up to lesbians. at least the pre-tense is a lack of tension

5:19am: livejournal
so like this week I was told sometimes I may exhibit sociopathic tendancies.. tho not negatively to-be-taken! and last week I was asked if I may be bipolar, just-curious. not that I know of from some years of therapy etc.
hha. oi

10:58am: All's Swell That Ends Well (obviousement)
1950's American Technicolor suburbia, complete with white picket fences and chirping birds. Perfect. Just Swell. Josephine is a young housewife who despite her best efforts is unable to please her ever dominant and ignorant husband Frank. While enjoying a Tupperware party with her friends, Josie discovers that the solution to her unhappiness is to start a family. Frank could think of nothing worse. Whilst watching television, Josie stumbles across an infomercial advertising a new technology developed by Dr. Henderson - "The Contraction Contraption": a machine that transfers the pain of childbirth to the father through "micro-waves". There should be no lasting effects for the husband, just a "wake up call" for bad ones. Josie cannot sign up quick enough! Nine months later, and Josie, Frank and their friends Macy and Gerry are enjoying a summer BBQ. Without warning, Josephine goes into labour. Upon arrival at the hospital, she is rigged up to the clunky machine. Frank sits in the waiting room, uncaring, unknowing. Throughout the birth, Dr. Henderson turns the percentage of pain to be transferred to Frank in steady upward increments. After a long labour, Josie is smiling. However, despite the machine indicating 100% pain transfer Frank feels nothing. Josie and Frank return home. Josephine is totally involved with their new bouncing baby girl. Frank is still ignorant and sour. Josephine and Frank make their way up to their front porch. Suddenly they both stop in their tracks. Lying before them is milk, spilt everywhere. Written by Nick Ball

9:58pm: white lines // meanwhile, bakc to LJ.
well it looks so good to you, butt it tastes like poison to me/

so if anyone wants to get my car on PIMP MY RIDE, that would be just swell.
I would love it 4WD and TOUGHED-OUT. they could heli-port it to SoCal.
and it should definitely do stuff like this.

okay .. Im gunna goo out tonight. ..and celebrate nothing..

7:49am: once more unto the breach, estranged friend.

11:02pm: "..which is the ventriloquist, and which is the dummy now is irrelevant." ~Keith Olbermann

6:08pm: "His popularity with younger women might not be entirely unconnected,
some cynics suggest, with the fact that he has a fortune estimated at
£140million." (re: Jack Nicholson)



would you eat dinosaur bones?
http://dsc.discovery.com/news/2007/07/05/dinobone_hum.html?category=human

cute vixen feeds her young ..somehow
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=466429&in_page_id=1770

EVEN cuter..
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=466742&in_page_id=1770

and just as cute, my mother sent me this link.. red pandas
http://www.gardenbuddies.com/forum/messages/4337/1261409.html

I need one of these.. however white dirtifies so easy..
panda hhoodie

bochox silliness
http://www.spoonsisters.com/Merchant2/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=100&Product_Code=44502

backstroke of the west (yes I have this movie.. if you care for a viddy):
http://winterson.com/2005/06/episode-iii-backstroke-of-west.html

cool cool DIY projector:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6n6jW0XIV0

3:24am: remember that stupid show with that stupid character Screech?

10:17pm:

The story of 'Evira Madigan' has been a favourite forever and Ive finally got my own dvd of the lovely Widerberg flick! ..yet Im still lacking a copy of this epic.
the catcam - http://www.mr-lee-catcam.de/
automatic guitar-tuner! - http://www.actiontuners.com/
domino's pizza/corpse delivery - http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0427061pizza1.html
this stuff looks awesome - https://www.spinmaster.com/product.php?productid=16225&s=moon_can
I adore contortion - http://www.mouvance.com/jinnyjacinto/2.html
I was told recently I have an orange aura.

Mr T does not have time for jibba jabba
pritty nifty image.
..and wondering where Tonya Harding's gone-to?
rAD hand-crafted computer boxes .. I should make a T.A.R.D.I.S. one.
Strange crime.
..and in other crime news we are happy to know that Mary-Kay Letourneau has been happily reunited with her family. ..seriously, Im happy about this.
and I want one of these. ..it looks better on her.
What would you do with 250LB of silly-putty?
Cool hearse.

( Suicide is Painless )

9:00am: h.r.6 passes!
new US oil-consumption regulations, mostly for automobile/SUV-too!
http://www.mail.com/NewsArticle.aspx?catId=1&articleId=1111454&page=2&newssiteid=1

10:49am: Im so cool-o-tron

Find out which Transformer you are at LiquidGeneration!

1:26am: when will I be myself

1:15am: ABSURDiTy - 2007 Model Pug recall - http://www.theonion.com/content/news/dog_breeders_issue_massive_recall

avoid ms spears' jokes okay? http://pics.livejournal.com/wesaturtle/pic/000etb2w

very strange, horrible news for P2P .. more absurdity - OHIO University bans P2P.. http://newteevee.com/2007/04/28/ohio-university-bans-p2p/

I s'pose this is good.. safety-shoes for prostitutes http://news.com.com/8301-10784_3-6066571-7.html


I remember liking this cartoon more than most other saturday anime .. GALTAR! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galtar_and_the_Golden_Lance

5:51am: gumption
so the flick drags-on as it may, yet that may be the point.. 'The Holiday' appeals to my sense-of-mind.

8:29pm: quizzes provide for us moments of focusing on our self. et blah blah
Stability results were medium which suggests you are moderately relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.

Orderliness results were medium which suggests you are moderately organized, hard working, and reliable while still remaining flexible, efficient, and fun.

Extraversion results were high which suggests you are overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense too often of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.


trait snapshot:expressive, open, self revealing, loves large parties, loud, social, outgoing, does not like social isolation, assertive, social chameleon, positive, always busy, likes to fit in, likes to stand out, enjoys leadership, brutally honest, trusting, optimistic, desires attention, dominant, aggressive, attachment prone, wants to be understood, realistic
-
[these results appear awry as the table/format settings are clashing ;or something]

11:48pm: disturbing art
I should maybe begin writing again. or something else..

3:34am: Modern English + Neurosis + Belly + Swans + Mancini/Mercer
3:34am: Modern English - I Melt With You

Moving forward using all my breath
Making love to you was never second best
I saw the world crashing all around your face
Never really knowing it was always mesh and lace

I'll stop the world and melt with you
You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time
There's nothing you and I won't do
I'll stop the world and melt with you

(You should know better)
Dream of better lives the kind which never hates
(You should see why)
Trapped in the state of imaginary grace
(You should know better)
I made a pilgrimage to save this humans race
(You should see why)
Never comprehending the race has long gone bye

(Let's stop the world) I'll stop the world and melt with you
(Let's stop the world) You've seen the difference and it's getting better all
the time
(Let's stop the world) There's nothing you and I won't do
(Let's stop the world) I'll stop the world and melt with you

The future's open wide

**The future's open wide

(Let's stop the world) I'll stop the world and melt with you
(Let's stop the world) I've seen some changes but it's getting better all the
time
(Let's stop the world) There's nothing you and I won't do
(Let's stop the world) I'll stop the world and melt with you

The future's open wide

hmmm hmmm hmmm
hmmm hmmm hmmm hmmm
hmmm hmmm hmmm
hmmm hmmm hmmm hmmm

I'll stop the world and melt with you (Let's stop the world)
You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time (Let's stop the
world)
There's nothing you and I won't do (Let's stop the world)
I'll stop the world and melt with you (Let's stop the world)

I'll stop the world and melt with you (Let's stop the world)
I'll stop the world and melt with you (Let's stop the world)

I'll stop the world and melt with you (Let's stop the world)
I'll stop the world and melt with you (Let's stop the world)

3:33am: Neurosis - Stones From The Sky

Once is enough, trial is alone. Grace fall into us.
All through the night, Father I crawled.
Sun of my soul be revealed. Walking amongst the stones
from the sky, feeling their rhythm wash over me.

Rite of this waring god. Destructive, alive, frees you now.
Rivers of fear, don't you know? Vigil of faith stills you now.
You've been shown over and over, don't you know?
You've been shown over and over, don't you know?


3:32am: Belly - Someone To Die For

Poor thing
Poor thing
Do you have sister?

Would you lay
Your body
Down in the tracks
For her?

Stab one
Tip toe in hell
...for her

Don't you have someone you'd die for?
Don't you have someone you'd die for?
Don't you have someone...you'd die for?

Don't you have someone you'd die for?
Don't you have someone you'd die for?


2:49am: Swans - Failure

I, I've been lonely
And I, I've been blind
And I,. I've learned nothing
So my hands are firmly tied
To the sinking leadweight
of failure

I've worked hard all my life
Money slips through my hands
My face in the mirror tells me
It's no surprise that I'm
Pushing the stone up the hill
of failure

They tempt me with violence
They punish me with ideals
And they crush me with an image of my
life that's nothing but unreal
Except on the goddamned slaveship
of failure

I'll drown here trying
to get up for some air
But each time I think I breathe
I'm laid on with a double share
of the punishing burden
of failure

I don't deserve to be down here
But I'll never leave
And I've learned one thing
You can't escape the beast
In the null and void pit
of failure

When I get my hands on some money
I'll kiss it's green skin
And I'll ask it's dirty face
"Where the hell have you been?"
"I am the fuel that fires the engine
of failure."

I'll be old and broken down
I'll forget who and where I am
I'll be senile or forgotten
But I'll remember and understand
You can bank your hard-earned money
on failure

I saw my father crying
I saw my mother break her hand
On a wall that wouldn't weep
But that certainly held in
The mechanical moans of a dying man
Who was a failure

My back hurts me when I bend
Because I carry a load
My brain hurts me like a knife-hole
Because I've yet to be shown
How to pull myself out from
The sucking quicksand
of failure

Some people live in hell
Many bastards succeed
But I. I've learned nothing
I can't even elegantly bleed
Out the poison blood
of failure


Moon River
by: Henry Mancini & Johnny Mercer

Moon River, wider than a mile,
I'm crossing you in style some day.
Oh, dream maker, you heart breaker,
wherever you're going I'm going your way.
Two drifters off to see the world.
There's such a lot of world to see.
We're after the same rainbow's end--
waiting 'round the bend,
my huckleberry friend,
Moon River and me.